Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Travels

I have been busy with family from out of state so I have not done much reading or working on issues that I need to work on. As a matter of fact, I may have taken a few steps backwards this past month! A sad fact but lets face it, it is easier to slip back into old habits than trying to keep going with new ones you are trying to incorporate into your life...
I had a wonderful time with my family but I did notice some very interesting things... over the course of their visit I recognized how my upbringing in an LDS family really did give me trips of guilt... they like to relax with a drink, as do I, but everyone was so worried how my parents would react that we (all over 40 years of age) were acting like kids! Hiding beer in the fridge in the garage, drinking outside (thank goodness it was warm) , waiting for them to leave so we could have that first drink... now mind you, they knew we were drinking and I do believe they did care BUT they did not say a word... it was us "kids" that had this guilt thing going... drinking at Oma and Opas house is a no no...... had to laugh at it but in reality is was sad! We are not alcoholics by any means.... but like a drink now and then!

Then when I went back to my therapist after they left she mentioned to me that my demeanor had changed some how... gone back to resignation about my life... not all the way back but I did some back tracking... and she worked hard with me to move me in the right direction I want to go... Instead of going back in 3 weeks I am seeing her next week to get things back on track... I will start reading my book again... and forward we shall go!

Laters!